Enlarge the Place of My Tent, Lord!

(Mirranda and I celebrating her salvation)

(Gepke and I on Outreach in Mozambique)

When I was on my own, I found that it was easy to get into my own world; I hardly spoke to people or went out of my way for them. I got caught up seeing my new surrroundings from a different perspecitive, which caused a lot of feelings to arise in me. In the past, I would try to numb them, forget about them, or basically feel really sad. But I didn’t want to do that this time. I wanted to tell God about how I was feeling, and as I did, I realized God was beginning to answer a prayer that I have had since October. This prayer has been Isaiah 54, particularly verse 2. I actually took the time to understand what it personally meant to me one day, and God really opened my eyes! Let me share with you…
I have been asking God to “Enlarge the place of my tent.” In the Old Testament, the tent referred to the place that God’s presence dwelt before they had the Holy Spirit. So what does this mean for my life now? Well, I am asking God to make more room in my spirit for Him to live. It’s almost like spring-cleaning for me, if I actually did that :) I have been asking God to make my heart bigger, so that I can love more people well. Rather than walk past the hurting, turning away from the pain around me, I am praying that God will help me to naturally care more. He’s showing me in order to do that, I need to get rid of the spider webs--my negative ways of judging, criticizing, feeling inadequate, jealousy, hopelessness, etc. Isaiah 57: 14-15, 21 says, “build up, build up, prepare the way, remove every obstruction from my people’s way…I dwell in the high and holy place, and also with him who is of a contrite and humble in spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite…there is no peace for the wicked.” In two other places in the Bible, contrite spirits are looked after by God and acceptable sacrifices to God. To me a broken, contrite spirit is to be desired. This means, God will usually use our circumstances to train us to grow in this area of character, just like muscles need gradual strengthening and building up. The mission school in Mozambique really helped in this arena, because I feel like I have a firmer foundation of WHO I am and WHOSE I am. I know this sounds like a simple truth, but we need to be reminded of this because this world has ways of making us “forget.”
It’s funny how literal God can be when He wants to teach you His Word. Before I left for traveling on my own, I felt like I should buy to tent to save on accommodation. So I bought a cheap tent that was supposed to fit two people, which would be perfect for me to sleep and to put my stuff. However, when I set it up to see if it would work, I quickly discovered it was way too small. I took up the whole tent, with barely any room for my backpack. I was unhappy, thinking how it was going to be absolutely uncomfortable to sleep, move, and live in this thing. So I took it back and got another two person tent that was larger. It was perfect! I could spread out and relax! I even had plenty of room to write in my journal and read the Bible without feeling claustrophobic. I was able to focus on Jesus, rather than the discomforts around me. And when I began to focus on God and His truth, He gave me more compassion for the people around me. For example, in the first time town I went to, I met a girl named Mirranda, who gave her life to Jesus. At first, I judged her, but I began to see her heart (as God does). We became friends, and I invited her to have a “girls night out” where I was staying. My new “tent” had plenty of room for her!
The rest of verse 2 also spoke to me a lot, so take some time to read it. I trust God will also give you some deep insight!